Catharsis

What a feeling, to have a long-standing tension finally disappear. It existed because I created it; I over-dramatized things. Once the conversation ended, I got into bed and extinguished my past memories of the whole thing. What's left in my mind is a blank slate that hopes to be written on.

Another conversation earlier in the evening; I was told to let her go. That we share too few interests, that our personalities are opposite, and that since the original feeling is gone, so too should be my loyalty to that feeling. It's not a satisfying way to end the what-could-have-been, but at the same time, I no longer worry. She has her life to live, and she's doing well from what I know. She doesn't need my interference, perhaps nobody does.

Later on, I make peace with my mother. I love her. She loves me more than I realize when I post shit about her, here. I would not be what I am today without her, for reasons too many to list.

I am clean and well - fed. I'm rested and I feel vital again. I'm in my apartment contemplating this whole episode, about to head for school, and I'm happy.

Today, let us make peace. Friendship is beneficial to everyone, and It's easier to maintain than ill-will.

I have a request; tell me how you feel about me. If i've done you wrong, tell me and I'll work to make it right. If you're happy with me, let me know so that I can continue to make you happy. Either way, let me know today or as soon as possible.

Thank you all. For everything.